Wednesday, July 12, 2006

My speech at Mom's memorial service

Thought I would share what I said today at the service. Okay, technically yesterday because it is now after midnight.

When mom really started getting sick in December, I felt lost. I asked God why he would do this to us, why would he let mom suffer so much. We thought she was not going to make it through Christmas. She did, crazy lady.

Slowly God's plan started to unveil itself to us.

I asked for a book to help me deal with all of this pain, this emptiness, this heaviness in my heart that followed me everywhere. Megan got me Hope by Nancy Guthrie. I started to read and do the studies in there. Everything started to change. Becky started going to church, she gave her life to the Lord and was baptized. That day it was put on my heart that it was my turn. I started attending Community Christian in Naperville with Dave. He was terrified of the large crowds in the hall, but we came back and it started to feel like home. I was baptized in March. We taped it so mom could "be there," just like we had taped Becky's baptism. In April Dave gave his heart to the Lord, this time his whole heart. We were all changed by this experience. We were all growing.

We had realized that there is one thing God wants. He wants us to love him with all our heart, all our mind, all our soul, and all our strength. It sounds very easy at first, but we have all struggled with it. Mom struggled with it the most. When we were doing our family Bible study, we would get frustrated dealing with Mom asking us questions that to us seemed so basic. What is love? What is trust? What is forgiveness? Her soul was crying out to us for help to find the heart of God.

So I did a study on trust, and Mom actually listened. She didn't fight or distract us. She took so much from the study. She learned so much. Ultimately, the only one truly worthy of our trust is God, and He is the only one who can truly heal our wounds. Now don't get me wrong, Mom loved God her whole life. One thing she said all the time was "All Prayers Welcome Here" She knew God's power and the power of prayer. But she still had fought his Sovereignty, the fact that "he rules" and is supreme "top dog." She felt like a queen, and when she couldn't do things she could do before she felt "dethroned" and she was mad. But still we loved her and tried so hard to show her that God was in control.

So, on that last day, when we were all there having our last goodbye party, she got it. Not that she didn't get it before, but she never got it with her whole heart, her whole mind, her whole soul, and her whole strength. On that last day Mom did something I had never seen her do before. She raised her hands and praised God. You all know Mom, she was a woman who did not bow down. But she did Thursday. She praised God and loved him with all her heart, all her mind, all her soul, and all her strength.

Good thing there wasn't anything in the Bible about all of your breath, we would have lost her right there, as she hardly had any left. Ok, really bad joke . . .

So I know, like the workers in the field, Mom got her full day's wage and is in Heaven with Christ Jesus, having a party and decorating rooms for all of us.

Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light."

I pray we all find rest for our souls like my mom did. Thank you for being a part of her life, or our lives. Know that she loves you. Know that Mom is at peace. Amen.

-Shelley Shannon- July 11, 2006