Getting ready for Thanksgiving usually means shopping for a turkey or a pie or side dish items. Sometimes it means making travel arrangements. Most of the time it means mentally preparing ourselves to see family that we don't always get to see. Sometimes its a good thing, sometimes its not, but family can elicit emotions most of us put away for the rest of the year.
What makes it so stressful? The past hurts we endured. The fact that we have grown up and changed and family remembers us the way we were not the way we are. Maybe its because we are around a trigger, things that set us off before that disappeared when we went off on our own. Some might say it is the mix of a large dinner, alcohol and dysfunction.
Perhaps that is why people in this day and age like the computer. We can be social without actually being with people. I sit here in my pajamas telling you about life, without having to take a shower, put on make up, or even be nice and smile. If we aren't with people, we aren't dealing with people and we can live in our own little happy bubble and not deal with things.
That is where we can start to be the turkey at Thanksgiving. This holiday is about family that you love and cherish. You get together to celebrate life, the bounty which God has provided for you. The thing to focus on is not where you were, but where you are. Forget the past, or remember it only as a benchmark. Concentrate on the good things that you have. The reason family is important is that if you don't have anything but the clothes on your back, you still have family. Now, if your family is not that way, make your own family. Family is not always about blood. To me, family is about love.
Where can I find a family that will love me irregardless of my faults and or my success? Ideally, you can find it in the Body of Christ. That's right, you can find it in church. But not the judgemental, holier than thou church. You need to find a church, a group of Christ-followers. Church seem big? Get into a small group. These people will love and support you because you are brothers and sisters in Christ. I found some awesome people where I go. While we may not be together tomorrow in person, I know we will all be praying for each other.
I am not saying I hate my family. In fact, I am very blessed to have a loving family that accepts me for who I am. I do know that I will still be dealing with hurt and pain about things going on in our lives, but I won't be the turkey. I will remember that I cannot be responsible for anyone else's feelings but my own. I will just smother everyone in love, and eat lots of stuffing.
Happy Thanksgiving to you all. May it be a warm, fuzzy holiday with lots of good leftovers. May you be blessed by those around you, and a blessing to them as well. May you find lots of things to be thankful for, and try not to worry about the rest.
Oh yeah, and Mom may not be there this year in person, but she will be in spirit. Ok, wait, technically she will be there in person because my aunt has her ashes, but that is just my morbid sense of humor.
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