Thursday, August 10, 2006

Facing my Fear

I have been facing Fear recently. Not things like spiders and dark corners, but fear of my potential. Have you ever felt that way? Afraid to step forward and introduce yourself, fear of saying yes to a favor? Things came out of my mouth Sunday that were not exactly me, but I said that I would be willing to do something. I know it is God's will for me, but still I am afraid. It is something I have never ever done before.

I have also found courage recently. I have been reading about Janet traveling around India and Sri Lanka. I could never do that. I just am not a person to travel where I will not be comfortable. But God wants me to be encouraged, I am sure.

I stole this from Sherry's Blog about fear. Check it out and see if it doesn't encourage you with your fears.

From Nelson Mandela in his 1994 inaugural speech - : “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us most. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and famous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in all of us. And when we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

Wednesday, August 9, 2006

Glad I don't sleep in a sink.

One of the things that has been on my heart recently is helping the needy. I have been looking for ways to contribute at my church. I realized is that there are more people out there who need help than just my church. I ran across an article about how the homeless shelter did not have enough volunteers over the summer, and that it can be a very busy time because of the heat.

I feel very blessed to have a home to live in. I have air conditioning. If it wasn't for my mom, I would not be here today. I have taken care of patients with no air conditioning. How they make it through the summer with no electricity is beyond me. I can't make it without air in my car. I feel so spoiled. I am so blessed.

I want other people not to have to worry about things like basic needs. Sometimes I worry what is for dinner, but I know I am going to eat. Some people worry where their next meal is coming from. I may not be rich compared to some, but I sure have a lot to offer to those who have nothing.

So here I am declaring publicly that I am going to volunteer myself at least once a month to help the underresourced in DuPage County. My first step begins today. DuPage PADS helps the homeless. I filled out an online application to volunteer.

What can YOU do to make a difference?

Sometimes all that people need is LOVE. I am not suggesting you run up and hug a homeless person. What I am suggesting is that you NOT ignore the people that you normally would. Sometimes it might be the nasty neighbor, or the quiet checker at the grocery store, or that person you see at work all the time but know nothing about. Share the love of Jesus. Let them know that there are humans out there that pay attention to people that tend to slip through the cracks.

Sometimes all it takes is a smile! I know it sounds cheesy. That would be me though, cheese.

follow up... I applied but they never replied to me...

Monday, August 7, 2006

Normal Life?

Have you ever thought to yourself "I just wish life would get back to normal!"?

I think there is no such thing as normal. Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans. If we do not take the time to appreciate what we go through every day, we will miss out on life. Healing is a process, it also happens to be normal.

I wish there was no such word "normal" because it set me up for so many expectations of life that I have not encountered.

Now that I have found God, and am living life for Him, I have to remember that I want a life that is anything but normal. I want to be courageous for His Kingdom. I want to be anything but ordinary.

Wednesday, August 2, 2006

Miss you like crazy Mom

I miss my mommy! She was my buddy. Who else would be up to talk at 1am about how my day went? Who else could make me feel good when I was having a bad day? Who could be a loving, providing parent when I needed one? Not my dad...

I miss you so much Mom! I will always remember you telling me you loved me and meaning it. I know I make you proud and I hope to continue to do so.

Lord help me to find comfort when none exists like Mom here on earth.

Thursday, July 27, 2006

MEGA-CHURCH experienced, MEGA RAMBLINGS ensue by Shelley

Well, ever since I took the plunge in March and got baptized, I have been digging deeper into what God wants in my life. So much of that is community, and to start you need a church. I found a great one, Community Christian Church. It is great, they have either TWO Saturday night services, or a 1pm on Sunday. For me, that is awesome. I work nights, and it is really hard to get my butt anywhere before noon. They also have 9:30 and 11, but I am not running a commercial here. My point is that it is the community, or the PEOPLE that make a church. I have just started getting to know them and getting involved. I am excited to contribute more... I am rambling again.

My new friend, Jenifer, took me to experience something completely new tonight. We went to Willow Creek in BuFu, I mean South Barrington. It took us a long half hour ride (from her work, would take another half to her house) to arrive. If you have never been this way, first I must say this... now I know where Bruce Wayne would live if Gotham were Chicago. There were these huge, and I mean gigantic, houses out there. With property! (Out here there are large houses with dinky yards.) Like picture a mansion.... those type of houses. Ok, that was neat, but I still was not prepared for what I saw next. The campus of this church (yes, this church requires a campus) was larger than most universities! I could only imagine what it took financially to get this gigantic, gorgeous, well manacured piece of property with gigantic, gorgeous, well manacured building(s). I am torn about it. I know it reaches tons of people, but I also wonder if that money could have bought a small country in Africa. Do people need waterfalls at their church? I like the idea of a bookstore, or coffee/snack shop. This cafeteria was the best I have ever, ever seen! Tons of different stations: soup, salad, baked potato bar, deli, grill, mexican, fish, too many to remember!

So we eat, browse the bookstore, then enter the auditorium. My high school auditorium has a balcony. This one has two upper decks! Everything was state of the art, cameras, video, audio... even the cushions were extremely comfy. Infact, I do not know if I have ever sat in a more comfortable staduim or theatre seat. Not that it needed to be comfy... we stand for at least 3 worship songs, and the speaker was so great he had me at the edge of my seat! I never thought I could go to church and leave feeling like I went to a comedy show, only better. My friend Jenifer found the phrase I was looking for on the way home... "pure joy."

We actually were talking about baptism, and how watching others get dunked elicits the feeling of pure joy. Non Christ Followers might relate to that feeling watching their child get born. Baptism is exactly that to me... being born. Only this time, its being born into God, into ETERNAL LIFE. Okay, sidebar over.

I really liked the experience, and I can see how so many people keep coming back. I was stoked to read the upcoming list of guest speakers. You get those type of visitors when you are the most influential church (non Catholic). Not to go back to my non-advertising, but CCC is #13 on the list. Oddly enough, the pastor from #14 was our guest speaker. (Sadly, Jerry Fawell is #27 but I suppose he is influential.) Oddly enough, there is a church in my hometown that made the list. So why do I drive past 500 churches to get to Naperville? I just know that God wants me there. That and the afternoon service on Sunday. Oh and this page on the College Church website. I don't believe that a church should exclude anyone from membership if they smoke or have a glass of wine with dinner or go to an R-rated movie! I believe that God knows my heart, and He sets the bounds. My church doing so would make Jesus cry. Think about it... if Jesus were here today, he would be in the smoky dives ministering to the lost. If it takes you a long time to quit smoking after accepting Jesus, that is between you and HIM.

Ok, once again I have gone off on a tangent. Pardon me while I take the log(s) out of my eyes. Must fight the urge to discuss liquor...

So my open poll is this:what is your take on the "Mega-Church"? Willow isn't the only one. They are cropping up all over.

I know I won't drive up to BuFu, I mean South Barrington, just to go to church. But it might work for some people. The crowd is too much for me, and I know that I would get lost there, its just my personality. I am super happy where I am, with where God lead me to be. Wherever he brings me to next, I am ready.

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

My speech at Mom's memorial service

Thought I would share what I said today at the service. Okay, technically yesterday because it is now after midnight.

When mom really started getting sick in December, I felt lost. I asked God why he would do this to us, why would he let mom suffer so much. We thought she was not going to make it through Christmas. She did, crazy lady.

Slowly God's plan started to unveil itself to us.

I asked for a book to help me deal with all of this pain, this emptiness, this heaviness in my heart that followed me everywhere. Megan got me Hope by Nancy Guthrie. I started to read and do the studies in there. Everything started to change. Becky started going to church, she gave her life to the Lord and was baptized. That day it was put on my heart that it was my turn. I started attending Community Christian in Naperville with Dave. He was terrified of the large crowds in the hall, but we came back and it started to feel like home. I was baptized in March. We taped it so mom could "be there," just like we had taped Becky's baptism. In April Dave gave his heart to the Lord, this time his whole heart. We were all changed by this experience. We were all growing.

We had realized that there is one thing God wants. He wants us to love him with all our heart, all our mind, all our soul, and all our strength. It sounds very easy at first, but we have all struggled with it. Mom struggled with it the most. When we were doing our family Bible study, we would get frustrated dealing with Mom asking us questions that to us seemed so basic. What is love? What is trust? What is forgiveness? Her soul was crying out to us for help to find the heart of God.

So I did a study on trust, and Mom actually listened. She didn't fight or distract us. She took so much from the study. She learned so much. Ultimately, the only one truly worthy of our trust is God, and He is the only one who can truly heal our wounds. Now don't get me wrong, Mom loved God her whole life. One thing she said all the time was "All Prayers Welcome Here" She knew God's power and the power of prayer. But she still had fought his Sovereignty, the fact that "he rules" and is supreme "top dog." She felt like a queen, and when she couldn't do things she could do before she felt "dethroned" and she was mad. But still we loved her and tried so hard to show her that God was in control.

So, on that last day, when we were all there having our last goodbye party, she got it. Not that she didn't get it before, but she never got it with her whole heart, her whole mind, her whole soul, and her whole strength. On that last day Mom did something I had never seen her do before. She raised her hands and praised God. You all know Mom, she was a woman who did not bow down. But she did Thursday. She praised God and loved him with all her heart, all her mind, all her soul, and all her strength.

Good thing there wasn't anything in the Bible about all of your breath, we would have lost her right there, as she hardly had any left. Ok, really bad joke . . .

So I know, like the workers in the field, Mom got her full day's wage and is in Heaven with Christ Jesus, having a party and decorating rooms for all of us.

Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light."

I pray we all find rest for our souls like my mom did. Thank you for being a part of her life, or our lives. Know that she loves you. Know that Mom is at peace. Amen.

-Shelley Shannon- July 11, 2006

Saturday, July 8, 2006

Saying goodbye...

Mom, I will miss you, but I will go on. You taught me so much about life, and now I am okay to live without you. You may not be here on Earth, but you will always be in my heart. I will join you one day in Heaven, and look forward to seeing you there in your new body and with all the glory of God. All good things must come to an end here on Earth. Meet you there one day. I know I made you proud, and I hope I always will. I love you. Shelley