A Hawk to hang on to

A Red tailed hawk came to visit me the other day.  

Things haven't been going the way I want recently, but they still have been going, and I have never been in need.  I ended up spending more than I had over the weekend.  Good news, because it was a holiday weekend, some of it didn't post yet and I ended up with a check that covered it, written out of my bank, so the funds transferred immediately!  I was pulling out of the bank drive thru when a hawk came and landed in the parking lot right next to me.  Now, this is less than 10 feet away, and its the closest I have ever been to a hawk without bars between us.  I felt brave and stared into its eyes, and it stared back.

Now perhaps I need to go back a bit and explain what birds mean to me.  They didn't used to mean much, but one day I was feeling pretty down, and I was praying to God, asking him, begging him to show me that he loved me, something to let me know he cared.  Then, at a busy corner in broad daylight, an owl landed right as I approached to turn left.  Now, first of all the chances of any bird landing right on the curb of a busy corner are slim, but an owl in bright daylight?  Almost impossible.  I knew it had to be God.  Ever since, when I needed reassurance, and bird would appear at just the right time and remind me.  God is watching, God loves me, God is in control.

Fast forward back to Tuesday and the crazy stress in my life.  The hawk stared back at me, as if to say "pay attention now, I am here, and I know you see me."  The hawk then proceeded to stretch out its wings and its tail.  It wasn't a quick flap, but a full and wide stretch, showing me its beauty, its strength, its glory.  God spoke to my heart: I am here, I am close, I am watching you.  I am strong, I am stretching my wings of protection over you, you are safe.  I love you.

Now I don't hear an audible voice when I hear from God.  Its just like that inside voice that you hear when you are talking to yourself, like an inner knowing.  

When I got home, I got some hard news. I bawled like a baby.  I didn't want to go on anymore to be honest.  But I remembered that Hawk, and I knew that God was in control and it was going to be okay.  It was if He came to tell me that I am going to be hitting a rough patch in my life, and its going to be hard BUT He will be with me and I will be okay.

I feel like a fool for needing the reminding, but God knows me, and that's okay with him.  

Your Love Never Fails (Jesus Culture)

Nothing can separate
Even if I ran away
Your love never fails
I know I still make mistakes
But You have new mercies for me everyday
Your love never fails
You stay the same through the ages
Your love never changes
There maybe pain in the night but joy comes in the morning
And when the oceans rage
I don't have to be afraid
Because I know that You love me
Your love never fails

The wind is strong and the water's deep
But I'm not alone in these open seas
Cause Your love never fails
The chasm is far too wide
I never thought I'd reach the other side
But Your love never fails

You make all things work together for my good