Merry Christmas to all

I thought for Christmas, I would share with you a picture of myself and Dave. It is probably one of the best gifts we can give, seeing as our budget is dry. It felt horrible to receive and not be able to give to family members and friends that we could not afford to put on our list this year. It felt horrible to only give so little to others when they spent so much money on us. I know for a fact that many people spent ten times on us what we spent on them.It did however feel good not to increase my credit card debt. (Not that I could, I am maxed out.) I hope that family members truly understand how broke we are. When Dave had to go to the hospital on the day of my dad's wedding, it did not help. Okay, it helped him, but not the bills. While we prepare to enter into our marriage (less than two weeks if you are counting) we face financial trials on top of everything else.

We need some prayers right now. I am truly grateful to God and what we have, and I am not asking for prayers for money. I am asking for God to be with us as we enter our marriage. I am asking for God to bless us in all our endeavors. I am asking for help with stress and managing money. I am confident that God will provide, and us two crazy lovebirds can fly off into the sunset together. I think I want everything to be just alright, and not tight so I cannot breathe.

I did have 3 great Christmases! As a bonus, I got to see my sister all three days! I got to spend time with the people I love. It was so hard to say goodbye. I wish they were in my life everyday. I guess I will just have to keep them in my heart.

Reindeer games

Do YOU know the secret words to Rudolph the Red nose Reindeer?

The other day, someone came in singing that song, and I chimed in with the extra words. The other person looked over at us like we were nuts. They didn't know that Rudolph had those lyrics.

So for those of you out of the loop, here (from my own recollection, not from any website) is the complete lyrics to Rudolph the Red nosed Reindeer.

Rudolph the red nosed reindeer (reindeer)
had a very shiny nose (like a light bulb)
and if you ever saw it (saw it)
you would even say it glows (like a light bulb)
all of the other reindeer (reindeer)
used to laugh and call him names (like Pinocchio)
they never let poor Rudolph (Rudolph)
join in any reindeer games (like Monopoly)
then one foggy Christmas eve,
Santa came to say (HO HO HO)
Rudolph with your nose so bright, wont you drive my sleigh tonight?
then all the reindeer loved him (loved him)
and they shouted out with glee (whoopee!)
Rudolph the red nosed reindeer (reindeer)
You'll go down in history (like George Washington)

In first grade, I went to a private school. We had the fifth graders come sing us a song for Christmas. Children are such bad influences on each other. This is the Rudolph song you won't forget.

Rudolph the rootin' tootin' cowboy
had a very shiny gun
and if you ever saw it
you would turn around and run
all of the other cowboys
used to laugh and call him names
they never let poor Rudolph
join in any cowboy games
then one foggy weekend eve
Sheriff came to say
Rudolph with your gun so bright
wont you shoot my wife tonight?
then all the cowboys loved him
and they shouted out whopee!
Rudolph the rootin' tootin' cowboy
you'll go down in history!

Church is good, mmmkay?

Today (meaning Sunday, I do realize it is past midnight and technically Monday, but I still have not finished Sunday yet so there!)I finally got to reconnect with God by going to church. We missed last week, and so I really needed to spend some time just praising and worshipping Him. The message really applied to me in several ways, and I walked away from today knowing God better than ever. Three highlights to share:

1. God/Jesus is the perfect example. Ever question how to handle a situation? How did God handle it? Sure, he is God, but there must be a reason. What would Jesus do is more than a cliche, it actually makes sense when you are lost. Try it, you just might be surprised.

2. You can cry and worship Him. I became so overwhelmed with His love for me, and his Holiness and glory that I cried. I took communion, and had a communion with Christ. I cried. Yes, that is why I ducked out of the gym today. It was a good cry, and then I came back to sing His praises.Unfortunately, most people frown on mucus in church.

3. He can read your mind. Troubled about something? Someway, somehow, He will let you know. I have been worried about a situation, and it was answered right there in the message today.Here is how to deal with X, God said indirectly through Tim. If the church had the video up, I would link it.

Of course, all of this is backed by my continued Bible reading and prayer/ meditation. It is great having a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Today, I got to go over to his house for a little while...

My God is a living God, active and powerful, meaningful today more than ever. May you be able to feel just a sliver of love that I felt today from Him, and may it bring you peace.

Melty

I just totally dig the expression on this rabbit here. Pretty desperate rabbit to lug out the hair dryer, er hare dryer. It doesn't look like that here though. Snow has melted. Every once and a while you come upon a black lump of ick that used to be snow. The only snowmen out now are the inflatable kind. So is global warming finally rearing its ugly head? Are we doomed for a horrible ice storm or blizzard later this winter? Well, only God knows. Sometimes I get so wrapped up in what the weather is going to be like. Maybe its because mom used to be paranoid about bad weather. Maybe it is because it is the only thing out of my control. I keep thinking and wondering what the weather will be like for my wedding. I worry about the safety and travel of my guests and participants as well as what the day will look like. It is out of my control, and I realize that. So, why can't I let it go?

It is an important day. I know that my wedding happens only once in a lifetime. I cannot control the weather. I cannot control much of anything past what I have planned. What I want more than anything is something huge and overwhelming. Something I totally have very little control over. I want God to use this opportunity to show his love to people whose hearts are still hard. I want God to melt hearts at my wedding. Not for me and Dave, but for God. Is that ambitious? We are supposed to be lanterns, beacons of light for Him. I just pray that God is known at our wedding, and that our marriage brings his light to many others.

It won't happen overnight. Took nearly 30 years to melt my heart totally. Now I am all for him. Mold me God, shape me to your will. Let me be a light for you. If not a giant one, than just a tiny beam. I want the world to understand what it means to be resurrected. Jesus has brought me back from the dead, and he can do it for you. He can heal you. Let him. Jesus loves you.

Ok, cheese factor of 10 for this post. I apologize, but I am in love...

I want to know you, better than I do

My Bible reading has had me in John and Revelation. My cd player has Jennifer Knapp. The more I read the Bible, the more I know Jesus. The more I understand this trinity concept. The more I understand God's will. And the chorus for "Into You" run through my head.

She's a skin art junkie, all cute and petite
all her fat-cat schemes don't look around
don't you even blame me
it's a real bad thing to spill your shades for a blind man to find it
who can feel the whole earth move and don't even mind it

CHORUS:
I wanna know you
better than i do
relieve from myself, bring me into you
i wanna know you
better than i do
relieve me from myself, bring me into you

she's a wanna be hero
yeah, she try to be strong
but at the end of the hour
you find that the tower ain't standing so tall
it's a real hard thing
to show your weakness
if anyone can love you, i know my King does

-Chorus-

Your Holiness
Your Kingdom
Your Righteousness
My Freedom

she's an easy scare
she's a simple bluff
she's a timid girl
she's in love


That is me. I am in love. I want to give it up to Him so I can be free. I want to feel his love in me and through me and for me and for others. I can not use words to describe this. Read Jesus's prayer in John 17 then see if you get the feeling I do. One. Unity. Love. Not hate and disease and war.

My prayer is that this Christmas the world gets just a taste of the love of God. And it I pray that it makes the world thirsty for God. I pray that people turn to God to fulfill their thirst. I pray that all believers become stronger in their faith and learn to shine their light in the world. I pray that we all get to know you Father, better than we do.

Don't let it snow

Death of snowmen, my greatest wish. Not that I have anything against them, they are cute and all. I hate this frigid weather. My legs ache in the cold. My face and hands get extremely chapped. My gas and electric bills go up, because I need to supplement my furnace due to leaky windows. That and I hate the cold, have I mentioned? I loved Thanksgiving week. 50 degrees, sunny, and layers were totally unnecessary. This is the part of the year that I keep wishing would just zoom by. You might say here, but Shelley, why are you getting married in January then? Simple, I need yet another reason to look forward to winter. I need to have good things to go along with the bad. It would not be so bad if the wind didn't cut me down to the core, my lungs didn't protest with every breath, and my toes and fingers didn't have to defrost. I am really looking forward to Arizona, where I won't have to wear a scarf and 3 coats to stay warm.

One month to go... the final countdown

Yesterday, Dave and I got together with Troy McMahon. Troy is the pastor who will be officiating our wedding ceremony. We went over the ceremony details and Troy even had Dave practice repeating the vows after him. I got "mushy," as Troy called it, hearing Dave speak those words. This is the part where I thank God for waterproof mascara. After all, the photos happen after the ceremony. We also realized we need more music that I thought, and promptly notified our keyboard player. I also called Becky who will be doing a reading from the Bible for us. I kind of decided on this pretty much last minute, which is why I only asked her yesterday. Megan will also be singing a song, which she wrote. I am super excited about that.

I guess the way I will try not to be too "mushy" at my wedding is by thinking of Troy as Buzz Lightyear, Stretch Armstrong, a teddy bear, or He-Man thanks to his wife Janet and her blog entry about Troy being a toy. That is much better than picturing my guests in their underwear.

Now comes the part where all the details come out. The last 30 days of planning are here. Where does this go, who sits where, which song plays when. Have the dresses come in? Will they fit? Will all the groomsmen get tuxes, and in time? Will my dress fit? Will I be able to get everything done in time? Will I have enough money for Christmas and the last wedding details? Will I forget something?

The important part is that Dave and I both show up, oh and Troy. We are making vows before God, before friends and family, to love, honor and cherish each other. Yet I know we only do this once, and we want to do it right. We have the licence, Troy could have made it official yesterday! But we are gonna do something right for once in our lives. I know we are blessed by God, and we want nothing more than to be able to bless others with our wedding, our love, our faith.

Thank you to Troy for being such an important part of our lives.